The other day, I received some mail in my post box. It wasn’t a postcard from my friendly real estate agent telling me how my house is worth much more than I think. Nor was it a letter from my local council member telling me how she is spending my massively inflated rates, based on how much friendly real estate agents think my house is worth. It wasn’t an electricity bill (they just hit me online now), or a catalogue from Vintage Cellars (although I do like those). This was a hand written envelope addressed to me, and I must admit I felt a small thrill upon seeing it (yes, it is possible that I need to get out more!) I was even more thrilled when I opened it, and found a beautiful note from a dear friend whom I shall call Caylie (because that’s her name) congratulating me on my new blog and website. Now, many friends have told me how they love what I’m doing, and it really does warm the cockles of my heart (does anyone actually know what cockles are?) But to know that someone actually took the time in this day and age to find a nice card, write some heartfelt words on it, put it in an envelope, and take it to the post office to buy a stamp (because nobody keeps stamps at home anymore- do they?) and then post it. Wow- I am exhausted just thinking about it, in these digitised times of automatically clicking send or post.
It made me think back to all the precious letters I have kept over the years- beautiful long heartfelt love letters from my long distance boyfriend (now long time husband), funny and descriptive postcards from friends backpacking overseas, and treasured handwritten cards from much missed relatives that are sadly no longer with me. In a way these missives are all relics of another era, but I am so glad I still have them in my possession. I may not look at them often, if at all, but it is certainly a comfort to know that they are safely sitting in a special box in the top of my cupboard, ready to be reread if I need to be reminded of how loved I am and how loved I have been throughout my life. Yet, I feel sad that my children will not have these memories to cherish. Sure there are a few birthday cards with some special words written on them- but heartfelt letters that someone has really taken time to consider their words over? I don’t think so. So, I have decided to once a year write (not type) a letter to each of my three children telling them the things I have loved about them and loved doing with them in that year. I will give it to them on Christmas day (not during present time- I’m not completely naive!) and tell them how much I love them, and that I want them to keep these letters in a special spot to read whenever they want to.
I am perfectly ok with the fact that they may not be that interested in what I have to say at this point in time. But it is my hope that maybe one day a grumpy teenager who is having a hard time expressing themselves, will be sitting listening to terrible music in their room, and feeling like the world is against them might think to read some words from me that they would never listen to spoken out loud. They would remember that no matter what, I am in their corner and I love them unconditionally. Or if God forbid, something happened to me, and I was no longer here for them, there would be tangible written evidence of my all-encompassing love for my children that survives long past texts and Facebook updates. If (there doesn’t seem to be a guaranteed ‘when’ in this day and age) they leave home, they may well leave these letters behind, along with long forgotten kinder drawings, soccer medallions, and written stories about magical kingdoms. But thats ok, because I shall keep them, ready to be the custodian of their memories until one day, they too need to remember how much they are loved and have been loved throughout their life.
Do you still write letters to people? Or do you write special notes for your children? I would love to hear from you…
Such a lovely idea Melissa. It’s reminded me how much I treasured the letters my dad wrote to me when I was a university – not only at the time but most especially after he’d passed. And how upset I was when they were (accidentally) thrown out when I left home.
My sidekick is still only little, but I love the idea of having letters tucked away for her. A tradition to start this Christmas I think 🙂
Clare
x
Oh Clare, I’m sorry you lost your letters from your dad, but how great to start a new tradition in your own family x
That’s so beautiful Mel! I picked my son up from school early the other week as he was having a hard week and he presented me with the most beautiful little note (just on a post-it) telling me how me he loved me. It made me melt! I like your Christmas idea and think I’ll do something on Christmas Eve when we’re usually quiet (hubby always out playing at Carols).
Thanks Caz, those little notes from your kids are so precious aren’t they. Christmas Eve would be a great time to write something (assuming your not wrapping last minute presents like me!)
Beautiful plan Mel, I will start writing notes to the children throughout the year as well.Cheers, Chris
I’m sure they would love that- what kid doesn’t like receiving post in the mailbox!
Wonderful post. I used to love getting handwritten letters and postcards! Now it’s all iMessage and Facebook. Even the long email updates don’t happen so often anymore.
Thanks Raquel. You’re right- I think Facebook has taken over even the email update! it is a lovely feeling to both give and receive a handwritten letter, isn’t it.
there are many times through the year that i pull out that special box from my cupboard that has letters and cards from my grandparents, mum, dad sister and old friends and the sound of their voices as I read is rich and warming to me. I have written letters to my kids each year but they don’t have them yet. They sit just waiting for when they are older and need my voice in their heads again. What they do have now is a collection of silly and completely embarressing notes with very bad drawings that often over the years have been hidden in their school lunch boxes. Notes that wish them happy eating or a fun day. Notes that tell them in symbols that i miss them or what we might be having for dinner that night. It started as a way to be with my oldest (now 14) who was very nervous about leaving mummy for school and has just continued with her and my son as well. She still tells me its ‘so embarrassing’ but they come home each time and she puts them in a box as she laughs at what a dork her mum is. I know one day she will treasure them.
How wonderful Angela, thank you so much for sharing that- I might start up a few lunch box notes as well! xxx
What a beautiful post Mel! I also have boxes of letters from loved ones and have started scanning them and sending them to those who wrote them to me years ago to give them some insight into their life at that time- it’s a lovely gift idea! Your blog posts are delightful Mel and it feels like you’re right with me having a cuppa every time I read one. Much love to you xxx
Thanks Caylie- you inspired it! What a lovely idea that is, although I think I would laugh if someone showed me some of my old letters that I wrote! I’m so pleased you’re enjoying my blog, xxx
I have always loved sending people mail. When I moved 3 hours away from my family and friends I started sending mail a lot more – especially Birthday cards and such. I got such a thrill doing it that I started sending people mail for no reason at all. I love sending my Grandparents updates on my life, sending notes to people who are inspiring me, and I also love sending thank you cards. I just think sending/getting mail is so special in our technologically driven world 🙂
That’s fantastic Chloe! I am sure that the special people in your life would absolutely love receiving mail from you- particularly your grandparents, x
I too love a good handwritten note. I tend to send them more than I receive them. The act of sitting down, thinking of words, and writing them out without mistakes is not something to be ignored now-a-days. I actually think more when I hand write a letter or note now because know how few people get them. I just hope they can read my handwriting!
Thanks for that April, I agree that writing a letter makes you think more carefully about the words you choose. My handwriting definitely needs some improvement though! 🙂